Porn, Television, and Delayed Marriages : Challenges faced by Young Muslims

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by Zahack Tanvir

Youth play a major role in the society, instilling positive traits in the youth makes the society upright the future generations principled. Corruption and disintegration in the youth takes the society to the dungeons of disasters and failures.

For this very reason, Prophet ﷺ emphasized on Tarbiyah (upbringing) of children and the Satanic forces make their elbow-grease efforts to stealthily bungle the positive values parents instill in their children and destroy their personality from within.

Youth these days face a lot of challenges as they grow up. Parents find no time for their children as most of them only shell out money to get their children raised by the maids and mentors. We need to hammer this fact in our minds that “Our children need half of our money, and full of our time”.

More we get closer to them, more we can counsel them.

Porn Addiction

It’s a new-age weapon to kill the spirituality of our youth. Not only young men but also young women get addicted to this heinous addiction and later get addicted to secret habit which destroys their morality and makes them shallow.

Dr. Eric J.Nestler, Chairman of the Department of Neuroscience and Director of the Friedman Brain Institute at the Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York says that Porn addiction is worse than heroin or marijuana addiction. As the porn stimulates the brain to release abnormal quantity of endorphin hormones responsible for providing pleasure to the body. This makes the neurons weak losing their “plasticity” . He also says that, ‘Seeking to feed this addiction, can motivate parents to neglect children, previously law-abiding individuals to commit crimes, and individuals with painful alcohol or tobacco related illnesses to keep drinking and smoking.’

According to Tom Minnery, Pornography: A Human Tragedy (Wheaton: Tyndale House), he writes

“In United States alone 1 in 4 sexually experienced teenagers gets SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE (STD) every year, resulting in 3 million cases of teenage STDs. Infectious SYPHILIS rates have more than doubled among teenagers since the mid-1980s. Every year children infected with sexually transmitted diseases are more than victims of Polio.”

Besides that medical research, it’s Allah’s order in the Quran 17:32, “And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way.”

Prophet Muhammed  ﷺ said: “No man or woman should look at the naked body of each other (unless married).” – Sahih Muslim

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:  “Zina encompasses all the characteristics of evil: lack of religious commitment, loss of piety, loss of chivalry, lack of protective jealousy (gheerah). You will not find any adulterer who is pious, or keeps his promises, or speaks truthfully, or is a good friend, or has complete protective jealousy towards his family. Treachery, lying, betrayal, lack of modesty, lack of awareness that Allaah is always watching, lack of chivalry, loss of protective jealousy from the heart – these are the effects and implications of Zina.”

The doomed aspect of this disease is, young kids of hardly 8 to 10 years of age, some of them not even reaching the age of puberty get access to the loads of porn content on internet or through their school colleagues.

Parents need to keep a keen eye on their kid’s activity, Ipad, Mobile histories, and internet browsing history. The vigilance shouldn’t bother them too much nor does it look like overtly pestering, otherwise kids get disgusted with the presence of the parents. The matter is delicate and needs special strategy to help our own kids get out of the quagmire.

With the emerging trends of sexualization of even animated cartoons, parents have to be visibly precautious of what kids watch on TV.

Television

An average American child will see 200,000 violent acts and 16,000 murders on TV by age 18. Two-thirds of all programming contains violence. Programs designed for children more often contain violence than adult TV. Many shows glamorize violence.  TV often promotes violent acts as a fun and effective way to get what you want, without consequences. 

Even “good guys” beating up “bad guys” gives a message that violence is normal and okay.  Many children will try to be like their “good guy” heroes in their play.

Children imitate the violence they see on TV.  Children under age eight cannot tell the difference between reality and fantasy, making them more vulnerable to learning from and adopting as reality the violence they see on TV. 

A 15-year-long study by University of Michigan researchers found that the link between childhood TV-violence viewing and aggressive and violent behavior persists into adulthood. 

A 17-year-long study found that teenaged boys who grew up watching more TV each day are more likely to commit acts of violence than those who watched less.

Apart from the violence children learn through TV, a 25-year study says, tracking children from birth has recently concluded that television viewing in childhood and adolescence is associated with poor educational achievement by 30 years of age.

By all means, TV is another trap our youth are caught up in .

Delayed Marriages

Going further, grown-up youth are tied up between devil and the deep blue sea. Unfortunately the societal and cultural norms have made marriage highly difficult, and on the other hand there’s no outlet for the carnal desires so the youth resort to forbidden acts, that bring disgrace to the parents, society and the Ummah and a never ending wrath in the hereafter.

Allah the Most High describes the love and affection one achieves through marriage by describing the married couples are garments to each other.

“They are your garments and ye are their garments.” – Surah Al-Baqrah 2:187

Also He says in Surah ar-Room 30:21 – ‘Among His Signs is that He created mates for you from among yourselves that you may find rest in them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts.’

Prophet Mohammed ﷺ said, “When a man gets married, he gets one half of the religion. Thus, he should fear Allah in the other half.” (Reported by Al-Baihaqi)

Ibn Mas’ud says, “If I would live for no longer than ten days, I would marry lest I fall into a trial.”

Ibn ‘Abbas said, “You would better marry. To spend one day in marriage is better than one full-year of worship.”

Ibn Mas’ud said while suffering from plague, “Let me marry. I do not like to meet Allah non-married.”

Ahmad Ibn Hanbal also said, “I dislike spending a night without a wife.”

In fact, marriage brings prosperity and financial benefits as Allah promised.

According to a study and a survey by Kate Antonovics and Robert Town in American Economic Review, Vol. 94 (May 2004), pp. 317–321, married men are more prosperous and wealthy after marriage than unmarried men.

To bring the attention of the suitable matches and their parents, it’s highly recommended to get married as early as possible to avoid the secret addictions and other Haraam actions.

Conclusion

There are much more traps our youth are ensnared in which requires days and days to describe, however the issues discussed above have taken up perhaps majority of them and every youth struggles to push but gives up eventually due to exhaustion in continuous fight. But don’t despair the mercy of Allah, He is with those who persevere.

Zahack Tanvir is also a regular blogger and vlogger, he also holds diploma in Journalism from London School of Journalism. He often writes on Socio-religious issues.

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